Happy Thanksgiving

          The pain and stiffness has subsided in my right shoulder.  I still have a chemical burn from the patch of medicine.  It will take a lot longer to heal.  I’m in the peeling stage now.  It looks much worse than it feels.  It draws a lot of attention because of the contrast to my otherwise pale colored skin.  I also have been wearing sleeveless blouses because fabric makes it itch worse.  When I submitted the claim online for my health insurance I had to note that my injury happened at work and was a result of my job.  I have a feeling my claim will be denied and I will have to fight for reimbursement with my school. 

          The medical care was cheap in comparison with what it would have cost in the US but I had plans for that money so I didn’t want to spend it that way.  Since the same student took out my right toenail last week I told my principal I was going to wear tennis shoes from now on.  He lifted his foot up from behind his desk to show me his hiking boots and said it was not a problem.  I feel so fortunate to have such an easy-going principal.  I just pray he is still here next year.

          We got our package from our son this week.  We had ordered more electrical plug-in converters but the company would not ship them to Nigeria so we had them sent to Oregon and then our son put them in a box for us.  Clint had some of his favorite cooking spices also included.  The box was sent in a USPS priority box and it took a month as was roughly about $50. 

          I know it sounds silly but I hugged the box when it arrived.  It had come from the US and was packaged by my son.  I miss my kids so much.  The closer it gets to Thanksgiving the harder it is.  I am very thankful we are working that day.  I enjoy thanksgiving because it is a day to be with family.  I am not a cook or a “foody” so I am not missing the meal just the sights and sounds of a house full of loved ones.

          I was looking at my computer desktop picture of my cat the other day and thinking about a comment my son made when I got home last summer.  He said I acted like I was more excited to see my cat and my yard than I was to see him and his sister.  Actually, I think I consciously try to focus on my cat to avoid the pain of what I am really feeling.  I love traveling and having the privilege of serving the needs of children in what is now my third cross-cultural experience, but I am also a mother who misses her own children.  It is a loss of time which tugs at my heart.  I cannot dwell on it or it becomes unbearable. 

Once you become a parent you are always a parent.  Time marches on too fast and your precious time with your children at home is gone.  You must step back and force yourself to disengage a little.  If I had shown him my smothering- mothering side he would have been frustrated that I was not treating him like the grown up adult he thinks he is at 19.  Until my son becomes a parent, he will not understand.  I could not bear to even speak the words to him or his sister about what my heart was really feeling.  I would get choked up and never get a word spoken.  Yes, I gave them each a tearful hug but then I just had to quickly move on to save myself, by focusing on the lighter side of my life.

Clint is at the computer store today.  He walked there by himself.  He dropped his computer a few weeks back and it has been acting up more and more.  He cannot trust it to properly save what he has typed.  He has been having trouble getting onto the Internet as well. 

Perusing Facebook, email, and the Internet is our lifeline to life back home.   I cannot imagine how missionaries survived on snail mail.  It could be since the acceleration of communication we have just become so accustomed to being able to communicate at any moment, anywhere that without it we feel lonely. I also think many missionaries brought their children with them or were single when they went.

This experience has changed both our opinions about what we consume.  Last year, above the Arctic Circle Clint refused to drink the milk that came in a box.  He paid a fortune to buy the jugs of fresh milk and went without it when it was not available.  This year he is drinking it because a jug of fresh milk is not even available and hasn’t said he didn’t like it.  He is also drinking instant coffee.  I thought I would never see that happen.  I have actually been drinking a can of pop a couple of times a week and I am not a pop drinker.  It has no nutritional value and is just chemicals.  I think my body is craving the sodium because I sweat so much from the heat and humidity and don’t eat salty food. I have been eating more beef too.  There is just something about seeing the chickens running free in the street.  They are just too much in my face.

I hope everyone has an especially meaningful Thanksgiving this year.  I appreciate the fact you take the time to read my blog.  My blog does not tell me who reads it but it does tell me how many people have opened each of my posts.  You have a window into my world over here and my heart sometimes.  Everyday here in Nigeria is an experience unlike anything I have experienced in small town USA.  Sometimes it is good sometimes it is bad.  Yesterday, I started the day trying to cheer up a lonely  5 year old student who is missing his family since he lives in our school boarding house and at the end of the day I was chasing a cockroach in our flat.  It is just my life right now.  Take Care!